December 6, 2015
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Don't Make Me Laugh, PLEASE!
I had a rather exciting bike ride today. Rather more fun than one can possibly have, I’m afraid.
There’s a section of the singletrack in the wash that Sally and I have been riding for years. Over time, the rocks have grown bigger and the sand just beyond them looser as traffic and erosion have exposed more of them. Each time we clear* that section we laugh and say, “If we hadn’t been riding that for years, there’s no way we would attempt to ride it.”
Well, today there was a large, loose rock right in the middle of the sand trap which we use for a roll out, just beyond the rocks. Since it takes a certain amount of speed to sail over the tops of the rocks, I pedaled hard into the rock garden and couldn’t see the obstacle until I was hurtling down the face of the last rock. It was one of those damned-if-you-do & damned-if-you-don’t scenarios. Trying to stop wasn’t an option; a quick maneuver in the sand pit would have been fatal; and hitting the rock straight on (the option I chose) didn’t work out so well either. My front end came to a dead stop while my back end tossed me over the bars. One would have thought that nice sand pit would have provided a soft landing, but instead I was pitched off the side of the trail, into a jumble of rocks. The biggest, most protuberant rock arrested my flight by embedding itself into my ribs; while its companions nailed my hip, elbow and knee. As I lay there trying to re-inflate my lungs, Sally came pedaling into the rock garden, trying to gather speed to clear the hurdle. I heard her exclaim, “Oh, $!@#” as she spotted me lying in the trail below. Testimony to her skill is the fact that she managed to stop before running me over. (This is not the first time she has demonstrated such skill)
And then the worst happened. While I’m lying, still moaning, in a most undignified tangle of bike and limbs, the entire Redlands East Valley Mountain Bike team came down the trail. They asked if I was okay as they pedaled past. My response, “Time will tell”, seemed to satisfy them.
Before we started the ride this morning, I noted that my pupils were unevenly dilated. I found information online indicating that there were several causes, most of which required immediate medical attention. Further reading indicated that most of those conditions were caused by head injury so I dismissed them and went on the ride. One of the causes listed was glaucoma. So, I guess I’ll make an appointment with the ophthalmologist tomorrow just to check it out. Thank goodness I noticed it BEFORE my accident or I might have attributed it to hitting my head (which did hit a rock, but only secondarily, the ribs having blunted the force).
So, I guess I'm looking at a couple of weeks of living in fear of getting the hiccoughs while the ribs mend. Thankfully, it's on the other side this time.
*In mountain biking to "clear" something means to ride it without putting a foot down.
Comments (12)
"Rather more fun than one can possibly have"
Learning you have glaucoma rather than a head injury? Oh what great fun!! Ribs fractured and unable to breathe? ha ha that's a knee-slapper!! It makes me laugh.
=====NOT. You know, we'd rather see you sit knitting and watching Fox TV like a responsible adult.
VERY funny. What part of DON'T make me laugh did you miss? There's only one thing more painful than a cracked rib; that's watching FOX News. That comes under the heading "We Laugh That We May Not Weep".
Judy -- I've been thinking of you since last Wednesday and hoping you were safe and out of range of all that's been happening in your general area -- never thinking that you were doing harm to yourself! Take care of yourself, and heal well!
Oh, that was deeply unsettling. We small-towners tend to think we are under the radar of such things as terrorism. The sound of sirens and helicopters, once routine, now strike a visceral feeling of dread. The hazards of mountain biking are predictable and understandable but I will never comprehend a mother who could abandon her baby and leave such a legacy.
Yikes! I suppose you are going to be OK since you were able to post a synopsis of the event. I know it must have really hurt to land on those rocks but I suspect it is the injury to your dignity that hurt more... Get well soon!!
Disability has its silver lining. Yesterday, Mike drove me to work and my sister, Babs, picked me up. There's something very touching about the small kindnesses people extend with such alacrity. It reminds us that we are valued beyond words.
Major Ouch!
I'm glad you had a friend with you to ride home with you after your accident.
I hope you mend quickly and completely.
Ah, yes. I must say the sympathetic comments from kind people like you do help, even though I realize that the thought left unsaid is, "What an idiot!" And, of course, I can't disagree.
Oh dear! That sounds awful. Hope you will be OK. Rocks are such unforgiving things!
We took our revenge on the one that stopped me dead. Sally unceremoniously picked it up and heaved it off the trail. The implacable one that did the damage just looked on impassively.
x >
I'm afraid your comment it too cryptic or too hip (or is it hep; I can never remember) for me to decipher. All it means to me is "x is greater than". I know I'm going to feel really stoopit when you 'splain it to me.
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